ninja mode

Phewwwww. Today was LONG. Cliff called this morning at 12:30 and I was still asleep being tired from not getting enough sleep the night before and then getting up early. He asked if I wanted to go geocaching, and apparently they were at CrapDonald’s, so I fell out of bed and into some clothes and grabbed my stuff and got ready to go.

Well, apparently we were going caching on THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD aka Genesee County Park, which wasn’t so park. The park was really pretty and HUGE. And mostly woods, but it was pretty neat. We hiked all over and found several caches, and didn’t find just as many because it was cloudy and the GPS was throwing fits.

We also unintentionally took several “shortcuts” which involved completely avoiding really obvious marked trails and just smashing through the woods and brush. HEY LOOK THIS WAY IS FASTER! And we saw a deer, and some baby duckies, and they were cute.

I ended up snagging a Geocaching pin with a pirate on it and some Pokemon stickers. :B Which are the two best things I have ever found in any cache so far. I want to put one of the Pikachu stickers on Tomato because they are HUGE and neat but unfortunately they’re the kind of sticker that would get scraped up really easily. Maybe I can coat them in clear stuff or something so they would survive better. And I would also have to scrape some of the other stickers off, which would be ok since some of them are getting kind of rough and ugly and I was thinking of doing that. Oh Hello Kitty sticker, I weep for you… Maybe I can get a new/better one in New York. (Note to self: find hotel and plane info!)

While the trip was a good one and I had quite a bit of fun and took a few pictures, by the end of the day I was feeling pretty sick. I think maybe I was getting dehydrated or something since all I had to drink was the end of Cliff’s Sprite from CrapDonald’s, which was not a lot. And there were no water fountains in the park, which kind of bugged me. Even silly AKRON park has them! There were faucets and stuff everywhere, but no fountains. And I was starving because I didn’t really have much to eat, either. So while we were driving home passing all kinds of food stands and stopping briefly at one…then deciding to leave before getting anything…I pretty much wanted to cry. “Aaaahhh there it goooooes… Goodbye, hotdog….goodbye, pop…. ;_;”

If I had known we were going to the other side of the world, I would have brought water. And a snack. But I’m still alive so I guess I can’t complain. Though still feeling kinda ill.

Wow, so I am awake early today because I thought it was Friday and I had to get up early, because I have to get up early Friday, but I was wrong because today is quite obviously Thursday, and most definitely not Friday. And after several attempts to go back to sleep, here I am lounging in bed with the laptop anyway. Which is what I do too much of the time anyway. Not like I can do much else anyway, since I have no vehicle at the moment. Tomato is my enabler…giving me access to things like the internet and Photoshop and other fun stuff at times when I would otherwise be doing something else, and probably something else more productive. But I *did* spend $900 on it, so I might as well get that much out of it. And if that includes laying in bed surfing the internet when I could be trying to be a more productive member of society, then so be it.

So, back to things, I couldn’t get back to sleep. So I grabbed the laptop thinking I wanted to make some notes for a very specific lengthy email I have had on my mind for a while. Which somehow turned into “well, I’ll just check my mail first…” and here I am now, an hour and a half later, with no notes or anything to show for my time. Funny how things can spiral out of hand like that. But I guess now that I think about it, I can’t think of just what I’d really want to say in said email beyond a few things which I wouldn’t consider more than an opening. Well, I can think of some things to say, but they would just make me look so much like an “angry teenager,” which I guess I am, if you take just those words literally, but in the sense of the stereotype, I’m not. I just have something I want to say, and someone specific who it needs to be said to.

Oh well…I guess I will get around to that later. I haven’t had anything worth blogging about lately, which is kind of frustrating. I can’t even think of anything worth complaining about, aside from the giant fly that took up residence in my room last night. Ugh. I hate bugs. Especially big ones. Oh man and geocaching yesterday I kept seeing these bugs that were like giant ants with wings – is there such a thing as giant ants with wings? Or are they termites? I don’t even want to know! They were ugly and gross! Ick! Hate bugs!!!

What else…

I got my Hello Goalie t-shirt finally. It is even more spiffy in real life than it looks online, and I shall post some “in action” pictures after I wash and wear it again. :B Hooray.

Mom got her laptop, which refused to turn on last night when we tried it, but this morning, apparently the trick involves giving it a good whack on the bottom of the case if it does that. NEVER BEFORE HAVE I FOUND VIOLENCE TOWARD A COMPUTER TO ACTUALLY WORK!! Not that I’ve tried all that often, and especially not with Papaya or Tomato, but with some older things I’ve had that were basically worthless anyway, being violent never worked. Could this be? Some kind of new revolution in computer repairs?! Probably not…I smell a bad power supply. Or something. :B

Aaaand in other news, after periodically checking the bandwidth for my site over the past day and up to now, I have noted a definite increase in use. Which is very much odd, because by checking referrals, no one’s hotlinking graphics from here, and there aren’t that many spiders crawling the site…so that means people are actually visiting and looking at things. :O I have gone months where I’ve only used 50 megabytes or so in bandwidth…but I’ve hit about that mark already and it’s only the second of the month. Now, I have 10 gigs of transfer…so I wonder how much will actually get used this time? This is a sign of me being easily fascinated by silly things. No, rather, THINKING AND WRITING ABOUT IT is a sign of me being easily amused by silly things. As if we didn’t know that already.

Now…onward to find “breakfast!” I am hungry and I want a taco. And a slushie. But tacos are not for breakfast. And I have no way of going to GET a slushie. So it looks like it’s gonna be toast today. So very exciting.

Today is intense virus-scan-search-and-destroy-clean-up-you-dirty-computer!!!1! day. After getting virus warnings last night. Yay.

So…while the scans run on the laptop, I am posting from the desktop because it’s too slow to try and do anything with it while it’s doing that. And researching new phones, oho. I want this one. :B Of course there’s no real point, since I already have a camera….but it’s cool and trendy… Maybe in 5 years or so I guess when technology gets better and it will be cheap and not so trendy anymore. Sigh.

Went geocaching again…will upload pics later. 1 1/2 finds, since we only found part of the second one we attempted. And there were LOTS of thorns at the second one. Ouch.

Lately, I find myself saying “I don’t get it” to more and more things, more and more often.

Take for example that last entry where I went on and on about how stupid girls are (even though I am one.) See also: Star Wars episode 1.

But anyway. I know I said I wasn’t going to do this again, but here I am doing it because I have to get it out somewhere. Having it sit around in my head is clearly doing me no good at all. So skip this if you like.

My latest case of “I don’t get it” seems to spring from the way that even after three months stupid things can still have quite a sting to them. Although it’s currently not posted here, I’m fairly certain those of you who are readers of this blog since before the Great Blogsmash of May ‘05 have a decent understanding of just what went down between me and my dad, and probably know where I stand on it. While I don’t want to get back into all that, and I’m still debating whether to re-post the archives of those particular entries (along with everything else) I can’t help but find myself still thinking about the situation. And it’s not like I even want to anymore.

It just happens. Usually right before I want to fall asleep. I don’t know why my brain is so entertained by the idea of bringing up some really rotten memories just before I want to go to sleep… I mean, I’m dead tired, I’ve had a long day, and I just want to sleep. But I can’t. And whether I like it or not, I remember everything that happened on and on until it gets to be 2…3….4 am, and I fall asleep more from exhaustion than anything else. And then I sleep till noon, because what else am I going to do? I try and not think about it, I try and think of things that make me happy, but it all ends up somehow leading back to the bad things. There’s no point in trying, so at this point I just give up trying and try to occupy myself with the computer, or by playing with my DS, or by drawing until I am tired enough that it doesn’t really matter what I’m thinking anymore and I can just sleep.

It sucks. Quite a lot, really. I’m hoping tonight will be different since I went out geocaching all day with Cliff (new pictures from today on my flickr page, by the way!) and I feel physically tired, but I know my mind won’t let me. So even though it’s almost 2 am now, I probably won’t get to sleep until 3 or 4. I think it was almost 5 before I fell asleep last night, and that was after a good few hours of just laying awake, no real attempt to occupy myself involved.

I feel like I would feel better if I wrote a letter to the pig herself, telling the truth about what’s happened. Even if she didn’t believe me, even if she didn’t read all of it, I think that if there’s any small shred of self-esteem in her body it will get a nice slam from that. And based on what I know about her, she pretty well deserves it. Actually, what I’d really like would be to generate some really awful image in her head and somehow associate it with my dad. Like say, something to the extent of: “I hope every time you go into his bedroom you think of YOUR MOTHER. TALKING TO YOU ABOUT THE JOY RELIGION. AND TAXES.” Because religion makes you feel awkward. And everyone hates taxes. Of course if I were to write such a letter, it would never use such direct and laughable phrases, and I’d instead use the philosophy of big-wording her to death. Use more fifty-cent words than she’s got the mental change for, and tell her just what she’s really done and how I feel about it. Nonthreateningly, of course. Because while I’d like to slap her, that’s no real way to solve a problem. Unless you’re being mugged or something, I guess, and even then a slap wouldn’t do a lot of good, by itself.

I thought I finally had my head wrapped around this, but I guess not. Though having banned the Mattel IP’s from my domain does feel a bit better, since now I can write a bit more freely. And even if he is still reading this, screw it. I’ll find out. And ban some more addresses. And if he still gets in, then fine. You got what you wanted, Dad, I still think you’re an idiot for “dating” this woman, I’m pretty messed up after what you said, and I don’t see an end to it anytime soon. And I still say that “being part of someone’s life” by anonymously reading their blog is pretty pathetic.

I guess I’m going to try and sleep now, because I’m out of words.

I am excited about something. But I can’t write about it here. Or actually…shouldn’t. I could make it into a password-protected post…but I don’t feel like it at the moment. Mostly I don’t feel like trying to remember everyone I know who reads this and mass e-mailing a password to everyone. Maybe tomorrow.

Today I went skating at the bike path and it was fun. Partly because it’s a lot easier on a nice flat smooth surface rather than a bumpy one, and partly because I had kneepads and wrist thingies and was a lot less afraid of diving onto my knees. Or falling and scraping my hands up and breaking my wrists. Yes, diving straight onto my hands getting ground across the pavement like a big stone cheese grater… Not having to think about that (as much) made it a lot easier. I still skate like a four year old, but at least like a semi-coordinated four year old.

I attempted to teach Cliff how to use Flash today because he wanted to know how. He picked up on it a lot quicker than I did when I was learning it. Flash is tricky until you get the hang of it.

After/during that (seeing how I have two computers, ha!) we looked up plane tickets to New York now that we’ve narrowed down which weekend we plan to go. It’s actually a lot cheaper than I initially thought. If we do end up going that particular weekend and taking those particular tickets, we’ll be leaving kind of early, and getting back at a decent hour. Though I’m not sure if going that early is the best idea. It might be cheaper to go slightly later, too. Of course that cuts down on time we have to do stuff. Hmm. Decisions.

Got a bunch of work done on the Geocaching site today…it looks a lot less ugly now. Cliff cannot figure out why I don’t just draw out page layouts on paper before I try putting them together in HTML, but really, I can’t either. Mostly because when I do try to do that, what I end up with is never what I planned out originally. Or it looks good on paper and looks like crap on screen. I don’t know. I mostly like smashing things together in HTML and seeing how it looks rather than doing it on paper first. Emphasis on the “smashing” part.

For some reason these posts are not coming up with the right time on them, which I cannot figure out. But I think I’ll leave it. I have learned my lesson about messing with things like that. Just don’t.

I hope it’s nice out tomorrow. I’d like to go skating again since I’m not afraid of it now. Heck, I could even go by myself if I just went around the block or something. :B I would check the weather online, but every time I do that the weather is exactly opposite of what The Internet tells me it is, so I just won’t and that way I won’t have anything to worry about.

While driving to WalMart the other day I had an odd realization. It’s almost been a year since I’ve had my driver’s license and I still think it’s weird to drive places by myself. Somehow I have gained the trust of the Important People of the State of New York who have concluded that I am allowed to Drive By Myself And Not Be Considered Hazardous. Which is strange. Not that I feel like I drive “dangerously,” but weird. And I can’t figure out why.

Another odd realization: After going to both WalMart and Target I’ve decided that helmets ideal for skating don’t come in adult sizes. At all. I couldn’t find one single one. That was quite odd.

And WalMart is a ridiculously busy place since the food section opened. Yeesh. I wanted to say something like, PEOPLE WITH TOO MANY CARTS, STEP ASIDE! I AM IN NEED OF A HELMET!! DO NOT PUT YOURSELF BETWEEN ME AND MY PROTECTIVE GEAR NEEDS!! But I didn’t because I’m not really like that in real life.

But sometimes I wish I was. :B

So it took a while, but now things are back in order. At least visually.

This is mostly a test post to make sure everything looks ok after I added a bunch of things to the sidebar thing to the right.

I found a little piece of javascript that I modified to my liking which makes the 100×100 px. image over there change randomly when the page loads based on a folder full of pictures I defined. Not very exciting, I know, but it was to me. Mostly because I actually got it to work right.

And the other weird box full of pictures is a randomly changing thing with all the pictures is what is apparently called a “Flickr Badge” and comes from all the pictures I have posted on Flickr that are allowed to be publicly viewed. Flickr is a neat thing that I recently discovered…no…discovered a while ago and recently started using…where you can upload pictures and share them with whoever. It’s kinda neat, if you’re into that kind of thing, I guess. (Interested parties can see my tiny page here.)

And the Google ads are back as well.

It took me quite a while to figure out exactly how to modify the layout to my liking…but now I’m quite pleased with it.

At the moment I’m also working on a small page for our geocaching “team” (which consists of me and Cliff and whoever else happens to be with us on that particular caching trip, most often Al or Keith or Pete.) Apparently it is the “hip” thing on Geocaching.com to be part of a “team” and so forth, so now we have one too. We are called “Team Regals” since that was Cliff’s username on GC.com and we always posted finds under that since there’s no real point in posting a find on a cache from each of us, since we are always doing it together. I just had in mind a little spot online where we could post pictures we took while caching, notes about finds, information about caches we will hide in the future, etc. I designed a neat little logo too that we’re going to make stickers of so we can stick them in logbooks and stuff when we find a cache. :B Yeah. I’m excited about that, too, even though it’s not very exciting.

I guess that is all I have to say for now.